2014/07/24 in Uncategorized
Leonard was an educated man,
but that does not mean
that he knew the meaning
of every word in the English vocabulary,
not by any means,
none of us do.
When he came upon “lascivious”
he realised that he wasn’t crystal clear
about its various meanings.
He decided to test the word
and picked up an almost ripe tomato.
You are lascivious, he told the tomato.
The tomato turned bright red.
Now, is that anger, embarrassment
or sexual excitement? Leonard wondered.
Next he went outside,
peered over the fence
and addressed the bitch next door,
a Border Collie.
You’re lascivious, he said to her.
One of her eyes twitched,
then she turned away
to smell at something brown on the lawn.
Inconclusive, Leonard thought.
Then he got an idea.
I’ll be unconventional, he said excitedly,
and look in the dictionary!
Smiling at his daring
he rummaged around on his bookshelf
until he found a dictionary – covered in dust.
He blew off the dust
and paged through the book
until he came to “h”
The word “lascivious” wasn’t there.